Without being preachy, you can win an un-believing spouse. My wife has always been a good example of this,
never has she nagged me to be a better Christian by preaching or belittling me.
She never demands her own way, but is
always submissive. She lives a consistent
godly life before me and doesn’t constantly use my words against me, for
instance, saying you said so and so last week, or whenever, over and over until
I want to scream.
Many times wives make the mistake of comparing their spouses
to someone they know wishing their husband was like them. When you continually criticize your husband,
all you are doing is driving a wedge between you and him. If your husband doesn’t feel like you respect
him, he will start to withdraw mentally, little by little, from the
relationship. I think a husband is
looking for respect above everything else in his relationship. If a wife respects, and is submissive to, her husband
it should make for a better marriage.
Saying to be submissive to your husband does not mean you
should be a doormat, and I am not in any way saying that a man should be abusive
to his wife in any way or under any circumstances whatsoever. The husband is never to be a tyrant, a control
freak or misuse his wife in any way. Sometimes
when a husband hears that his wife should be submissive it seems to bring out the
beast in him, and that should never be.
When I say something that hurts my wife, it makes me feel
ashamed knowing that she doesn’t deserve that kind of treatment. When a guy comes home after a hard day at work,
he wants to feel appreciated and loved, like his home is an oasis where he can
get away from the hassles of life and spend time with his best friend knowing
that his wife has his best interest in mind.
As far as I am concerned, a women’s greatest asset lies
within her, and not her outward appearance. I would prefer a lady with a sweet and gentle
spirit over beauty anytime; praise the Lord, when I married my wife I got both.
My wife knew me in the good times and
the bad times. Before I committed my
life to the Lord, about 33 years ago, she knew me, as what I call a total freak,
ranting and raving, slamming things around, cursing, an out of control drunk
and druggy, a total mess and she still loved me and she has always showed it by
her actions and not by her condemnation and anger towards me. When I didn’t believe that anybody loved me,
not even God, she proved me wrong and because of her sweet and gentle spirit, which
I still experience every day after 35 years of marriage, she proved to me that
God could love me unconditionally also.
I am convinced that if a Christian couple, meaning a man and
women, get married and live the Word of God, they will have a good marriage
because the Lord intended it that way. It
says this about this subject in 1 Peter 3:1-7, “In the same way, you
wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are
disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of
their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. Your
adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing gold
jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart,
with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious
in the sight of God. For in this way in former times the holy women also, who
hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands;
just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her
children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear. You
husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with
someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of
the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered.”
If you meditate on these words and apply them to your marriage,
I don’t think you will fail, nor will your relationship. I think I have said enough. God bless and have a great day!!
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